Monday, September 24, 2012

Transformations By Renewing.

You know how sometimes you feel like you go through dry spells with God? I feel like that has been happening for a while now. No change, nothing happening, just me being selfish and ugly and not growing where I really need to be. But, I think I'm coming out of that, thankfully. I heard a quote once, something along the lines of, if you feel that you and God are further apart, guess who moved?. Boom. Me. God doesn't move away from us. We move away from Him. Because of one reason, He wants us to change something and we don't. So, we shy away and get further and further apart. The two things I'm seeing right now that I am having to work on, (yay!) is.... 

One, the fear of rejection. I have this in me SO bad. It causes me to not be honest with people, it causes me to compromise my standards, it causes me to draw away from God. Because deep down, I'm thinking about myself, and how I feel, and that I want people to like me and not reject me. But, God says many many times, that we WILL be rejected by TONS of people because HIS way of life is not the popular one. Talk about counting the cost. I have to choose between my selfish desires of wanting to be accepted and God and what His will for me is and what HE wants me to do. As of right now, I think that will be the most difficult thing to do. But, I think I might know the key to getting through it. Loving others. If I love the people around me, I will be honest, because I care about their soul. If I love people around me, I wont compromise, because I love them and me compromising doesn't help them. I want people to be honest with me, because I know that if they are, they love me more than they want my acceptance and more than the fear of upsetting me. It's not right if I want one thing out of friends and family but I'm not that in return. 
Number two, insecurities about myself. Which, I guess comes down to being all about myself again. The only reason why I would be insecure is if I am focusing on myself. They way I look, or the way I act, or my way of life compared to others. Me, Me, Me, Me. When I STOP focusing on myself I'm not insecure! Wow Gabrielle, what a concept! And another thing that goes along with that, (I know it sound cliche), is God made me the way I am, (physically speaking). Why should I question, or have problems with that? Who am I to say He did something wrong? It's like a doll telling the maker that it was made wrong, but it isn't. It was made EXACTLY how the maker wanted it to be made, and made that way for a purpose.  I think this is something most people go through to an extent, definitely some more than others. 
So, to sum it all up. I'm selfish and I think about myself all the time. It pulls me away from God and who He wants me to be and how He wants me to live. They only way to get closer to Him is by focusing on Him and loving other people. For real. Love is the key to everything. And not the mushy love feeling, but love as in hard love. Love that will get in your face and correct you when you need it and the love that will encourage you when you need it and the love that thinks about others before yourself. I get the "Love covers a multitude of sins" scripture now. It does, if you love, you wont sin. Because loving others and God is the exact opposite of sin. 

Don Miller says it best when he says, "The problem is not out there; the problem is the needy beast of a thing that lives in my chest." Truth. 

In love
Gabrielle

  

Monday, April 16, 2012

Christian Bubble

** May offend you **


So, I've been thinking about this for a while now, and after seeing Beware Of Christians (bewareofchristians.com) tonight I feel that I finally need to get it out. Here goes it. 


Something that really bothers me about myself and this whole bible belt and really all of the "christian community" is that we all live in this perfect little bubble world. We don't realize anything that goes on outside of us. We walk around doing the same things we've always done acting the same way we've always acted. We go to church, sing our songs, go to youth group, do our bible studies, but does anything really change? Do we ever think of what Christianity as a whole looks like from the outside? Do we look around us and at ourselves and say, what am I changing? What am I doing different? What makes me different? 


When I step back and look at Christianity as a whole, I see a bunch of different "denominations". I see a bunch of people who either stick to strict religious beliefs and laws that they think will allow them to "go to heaven", or a see people who say "saying a prayer" is all you have to do, we're sinners, go on and have fun (yolo, right?). But when I think about what it's supposed to be, isn't there only supposed to be one belief? One way? Why are there so many denominations?
 I see people who use Christianity as a business. Just a way to get income.
 I see it used as a way to make people feel good.
 As a way to manipulate people, and as a way to feel better about yourself. 
I see it used in all sorts of different ways that it is NOT supposed to be. But we all are in this "Christian Bubble" that we are oblivious to. We all walk around not changing anything, not doing anything about the downward spiral of this religion that SO MANY claim to believe in. And yet, where is the proof ? Where is the proof of this belief? That it's true. All I see is everyone going through the motions of what their parents or family did, or picking a denomination/belief that is most suitable to their lifestyle. I'm not trying to sound self righteous, I'm including myself in this. We need to seek it out for ourselves and LIVE it. Not say it, not use it when it's convenient, but really whole-heartedly live it. 


I just wish we could all stop and look at christianity as a whole and see how we are representing the God that we say we do. With myself I see that a lot of the time there is NO difference in the way I present myself, the entertainment I chose to watch/listen to, the things I do and how I act. I want to stop and look around and BE the different one. I hate having the term religious put with my name; because I don't see being religious as being a christian. Being religious is stale and monotonous. Religion is what people misuse to make others and themselves feel good, to make money, to manipulate, etc. Being a Christian should be a totally different thing. But, sadly, when you look at Christianity, it's not. 


If I weren't a christian, and if I didn't believe in God, or if I believed in a different God there is no way that I would change my mind by looking at the "Christian Bubble". We don't even live out what we preach, why would someone be a part of a religion that is full of hypocrites? They wont. Or if they do, we're just leading them down the same path into easy believism and a medicine to "numb" the pain. Not the real answer or cure. 


I challenge everyone who reads this to take a step back and really look at your Christian Bubble that you live in and evaluate it. Know I will be doing the same thing. What are you representing by the way you live, really?


Check these links out:
Beware Of Christians
Jesus V Religion

Lots of love! Gabrielle